Birthday wishes

Today would have been my (step)dad’s 63rd birthday. Aug 29 marked the 3rd anniversary of his death. The day itself wasn’t too hard. The night before I went to his grave, that was harder. So much has changed in 3 years.
He died a week before his 60th birthday and we all smiled for him because the age of elderly to him was 60 – so he never got old. Or so we joke. There are now days that go by that I don’t think about him. I have notes and photos from him around the house and I keep a box of special memories – I often go through it to remember different things. Jessica still talks about pappy even though we’ve never prompted her to do so. It’s like she just knows there was this person who would have loved her beyond recognition. And, without fail, there is always a butterfly around when we’re playing outside. I still think it’s him.
I’ve had a few dreams of my dad and I could swear to you that he was there with me, I could smell him and feel his hugs. They’re like glimpses of him, the things I miss the most.
So today, it’s not a sad day by any means, it’s still a celebration of a life that was – some one who impacted the person I will be for the rest of my life, even though things keep changing. I miss him more than you’ll ever know.
Oh – and today was the perfect day to find out that WE’RE PREGNANT AGAIN!!!

One thought on “Birthday wishes

  1. Congratulations (again!!) ~ I am sure that ‘pappy’ is dancing and smiling bigger than ever! We’re so happy for you all of you! My heart is swelling so big with love!

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