Get in the habit of doing grand gestures for my kids.

When I wrote this list I couldn’t get this idea out of my mind. How I wanted to be a mom who put my kids first like that. I want pretty things, but my kids want them too. I’ve been bogged down about how I don’t have time or energy to create such splendor, even if it’s to celebrate the silliest of things (A day of Jammies! A Bath for Breakfast! Ice Cream Parlor Wanna Be!) and really? Who am I kidding!!!

I have everything I need.

I have her.

I have him.

I have them.

And I wasn’t willing to wait another day playing the “reason” game on why I could hold off, yet again, on making beautiful things happen in our lives. I decided to start with breakfast.

Here are all my reasons for why I thought I couldn’t do it, when I tell my daughter every single day that couldn’t and can’t aren’t words we believe in … I was lying out loud.

# Money.
# Needing to be gluten free/healthy.
# Time.
# Not being good enough.
# Not being perfect.
# Worrying that they wouldn’t like it.
# Worrying that I didn’t have what it takes, creatively or literally (items used) to pull it off.

Here’s the truth: I own a glue gun and we have internet streaming in our house 24/7. I have everything I need to pull this off. I don’t have to spend any money. Gluten free can be pretty, too. I make the time I feel is important. I’ve never been NOT good enough, I’m their mother. I’ll never be perfect. I’m allowed to take chances. It was damn time.

I even woke up early, which is something else on my life list, to see her face when she walked out of her room. My son woke up first and the first thing he said was “Woah.” … My daughter said “You surprised me!” and my heart said “YES, YES I DID!, I LOVE YOU!”

Breakfast is a historically difficult meal for me but it’s my very favorite to make and serve. The morning my mom announced my parent’s divorce to my siblings and I was the morning she stopped making breakfast. My mom is Martha Stewart, folks. She made every single meal, every single snack from scratch. Then one morning … it all changed.

Here’s a secret: I think this is when my journey with food begins. I’ve never acknowledged that publicly before. But all of a sudden there was a void in my normal routine. Something substantial – my breakfast, the beginning was all of a sudden the end. Since that morning I’ve struggled with how to feed myself in the morning, and I generally choose to feed myself sugar, which is love to me, really. It’s no wonder I wound up with a broken pancreas. I broke it with a broken nine-year old heart and a shattered life view.

Seeing Jill Tanis has put a lot of healing into this very subject and now I eat eggs, savory tastes, every morning. I don’t always like it, I even fight it some mornings, but I’m doing more than feeding my body … I’m reminding myself – at every beginning – that I can trust that sweetness is still there, that it’s around the corner, down the hall and in my pocket … all I have to do is see it. I no longer have to eat it.

So, Breakfast. It’s kind of a big deal to me. And I wanted to start where I left off, I guess, in showing my kids how very much I love them. That I can break barriers and tear walls down to build them up. That I can do hard things. Because I can.

I’ll be cranking out a couple “history” posts and just rapidly publishing them here, I’m hoping to write them and then link to them on the About page so if you’re new here or just want more info on something I generally talk about, but need more details … it should hopefully be easy to find.

I’m trying to make this website a bit easier to navigate in terms of finding a stream of conversation on any given topic. Like, the gestational diabetes stuff. Or all the videos in one place. Or the How To’s.

Nothing else is changing – but I’m trying to be organized about this. It’s a process, to say the least.

Along with having to be super careful about what I eat because of the whole “you’re probably diabetic” thing – I can’t really have alcohol either. Except for red wine … once in a while.

For a while, after I read that Red Wine helped slow down the digestion of insulin in ones body that it was actually beneficial to a diabetic to drink a glass, I was having one with dinner most nights.

Then I read about diabetics and blood types – and how my blood type has low stomach acid and should avoid caffeine and alcohol … well, I haven’t had hardly any … alcohol … coffee in the morning is a harder one to let go of. But I’m a tea drinker too. I’m transitioning.

And tonight I had a glass of wine because today was crazy. Because it sounded good. Because I have a box of it in the fridge. Oh, yes, I do.

Then I proceeded to silly-email friends on facebook and giggle to myself about it, out loud. But after the past few days, which were total emotional wringers for me, a night like this. A light night. A happy night. A night with a little buzz. (Sorry, Grandma!) It just fits.

In other fun news – the results to our little poll on the next Cooking Demo topic are in!

So … it’s a tie for Healthy cooking and Cooking over the fire (which is a total surprise to me!) but I “test voted” once to make sure it was all set up and working and I voted for Cooking over the fire – so technically Healthy cooking wins this round.

There you have it! Details coming soon about Healthy Cooking – Cooking Demo.

Insert tiny print here: And Oh My Word, you should not read this and think I’m condoning alcohol use in any way, because please … I do not have that much power, but I know I’ll get emails about it … so just stop right there.

Here’s the fam:

We went up north to The Parent’s cottage a few weeks ago and spent the time hanging out making donuts and marshmallows from scratch. YUM.

In order to eat those marshmallows we needed a fire. So I took it upon myself to lick the flame.

I may have paraded around giggling after the whole “I build fire!” thing, but it was fun … there’s a technique to building a fire – one with air flow and oxygen. It was good times.

Then we waited for the flame to die down and give us some coals in which to roast the marsh’s …

And our weekend was complete.

Moving on. It’s Friday. Happy Happy Friday and the sun is shining and I can see patches of grass.

Yesterday morning my daughter requested that we go on a walk right away after waking up, so we got ready and went downtown for some clean sidewalks and sunshine. Tulips are peeking through soil. I had my camera and she took control of it while we sat in a coffee shop and warmed our hands after the walk, drinking coffee and eating yogurt.

Some times it’s the little things.

I’m doing more face to face interaction where this website is concerned and I love it. I love meeting other local bloggers and having conversations. However, one of the biggest conversation starters is always “What do you blog about?” and it’s what has me thinking today.

There are mostly buckets other folks would like you to fit in to when explaining your blog/brand/website. Whatever the case may be. For Real Food Bloggers, this is an easy answer. Sure their family life is part of it – but the main focus of their website is Real Food. Their passionate about it, it’s what draws them a crowd.

Advertisers, networks and sponsorships LOVE a crowd.

Other buckets to fill are the Frugal bloggers, Travel bloggers, Fashion, Coupon, DIY, Home Improvement, etc etc etc. It goes on. On the bottom of that list is the Mommy Blogger.

I. Am. Not. A. Mommy. Blogger.

The whole reason I still write here is because I need something OUTSIDE of the life I live as a mother to keep me sane. I write about my life, period. Where’s the bucket for that? Where’s the crowd so an advertiser or sponsor sees value in ME. Because, folks, that’s what this is. Me.

Pitching a website like this is like selling yourself, not unlike a salesperson in a profession. Real Estate, Home based businesses, Consulting of any kind. Your “customer” (in this case a “reader”) has to buy into Me. Like Me, eventually care about Me.

Let’s just take it to the basics.

Mega bloggers have catapulted, mostly by accident, into an audience that already cares about them. The “un-bucket” blogger has to navigate the thick and tricky waters in order to find a footing. And maybe we’ll grab our audience as we stumble through the wires.

There’s probably no room for validation for this kind of blogger, the un-bucket writer who wants to feel value in the form of acceptance from their audience, an advertiser … a sponsor. So how do we define our websites? Do we have to come up with a niche? Even if it’s broad? Do we have to create a community – even if it’s small – that will support the pull of a network?

Where’s the conversation going for a blogger like me? Do I have to decide that I’m doing this just because?

I live out loud. I take photos of it, spend my time writing about it and often times directing friends/readers/traffic to other sites because I can. Because I want to. Because it’s fun. I never did this to make money, but 10 years later … there’s money to be made.

Why the hell do I have to fight so damn hard for it?

If you want a niche – here it is:

I’m a Diabetic, gluten free foodie who makes food for my family according to their blood types. Then I write about it. I’m a How-To junkie. A hobby-photographer. A woman. I’m learning to love fashion and I’ve always loved to decorate. I’m a mother. I’m a wife to a Serial Entrepreneur and we’re business owners. Plural. I’m a gardener and wanna-be bee-keeper. I have a life list and I live out loud. Take it, or leave it. But please … take it.

**I have nothing against a self-proclaimed Mommy Blogger. I read their sites and love them, I just am not one and am super tired of being thrown into that mix. I am a mom, I do blog, but about WAY more than parenting and kids. That’s my disclaimer. I love you all.

I’ve been hoping I could find the inspiration to do a garden tea party. I thought I had something like this on my life list, but alas, I’ve just been dreaming about this in my head. But then I found this site and Holy Moly.

Alice in Wonderland party via Hostess with the mostess

Gorgeous, no? So many beautiful ideas.

See also this Alice In Wonderland party:

Complete with downloadable party planner . Awesome.

Let’s just round this out with some great ideas for food and decoration for the outdoor tea party:

Edible Centerpiece from Hostess with the mostess again, she’s got it going on.

And then there’s this fabric banner you can make from V and Co .

Now without further ado the winner of the Etsy print giveaway goes to:

Congratulations Donielle! Look for an email from me shortly!

I want to say a huge thank you to Red Bird Ink for sponsoring this giveaway in conjunction with the cooking demo . I had a blast and am so thankful for the friends and opportunities this site has brought to my life. And Letterpress. Can’t forget to thank the Letterpress.

Don’t forget to enter to the giveaway for this awesome print over here!!!

It’s official. I’m ready for spring. I’m chomping at the bit to get started on some projects .

Which so wonderfully has everything to do with my Life List , number nine to be exact. Learn Carpentry.

I was all set to sign up for some shop-type classes when I discovered Knock Off Wood via Young House Love a few months ago and OH MY WORD. I can’t stop building things in my head and decorating our house. I’m very excited.

But first, we’ll be repainting Jessica’s bedroom and getting her a new bed so Oliver can have her current one. I’ll be bringing you along for the ride. And hopefully have some surprises for you along the way too. Oh this is fun!

(Also, if you don’t mind … would you be willing to give me some input on the next Cooking Demo topic? I’ve got a small multiple choice survey (4 options) if you want to weigh in on it for me! THANKS)

The Cooking Demo yesterday was a ton of fun!

I came home exhausted and completely full of good food but even better – full of good life. Good conversations, good friends, good experiences.

I was a little worried about doing something like this at first – once everyone was there they kind of just sat there looking at me waiting for me to start. Which is when I said – uh … please don’t stop talking. I have no idea what I’m doing!

But I think it went good. We kept the conversation going, I hope I said something that made sense during the whole time. It was so very nice that I knew most of ladies in attendance ahead of time. Made me WAY more at ease about acting like I have anything important to say.

I wasn’t sure if I should narrate everything I was doing ala Rachel Ray on TV or if I should just whip stuff out and answer questions as we went along. I didn’t know if I should focus on what I think about being in the kitchen (Keeping things simple, use substitutions, get creative!) or if I should focus on what the ladies knew and felt and go from there.

All in all, it was a fun time. I would totally do it again. In fact, I’m already planning the next one. I think instead of going through a whole meal I’ll pick something (like fish or desserts – but not together!!) and focus on that.

I felt like most of the attendee’s were really interested in the fish yesterday, what I did with it, how I did it and how I went about cooking it. Which didn’t even cross my mind when I was planning it – thinking that I should focus more on one thing than another.

I also didn’t man the camera very much and many thanks go to Rebekah for taking some photos along the way. I’ll have to be better about getting in there and taking some photos next time.

And like I said yesterday we had some pretty awesome sponsors to help it go that extra mile:

Kitchen Stories offered me a wonderful discount so I could send my attendee’s home with a little something-something . I just love her quote right off the bat – “I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.” - Mae West I mean, how can you not want to hang out with this wonderful lady?

I didn’t have the budget to gift an apron to each of my guests … but you have to see these. The Pretty Ditty etsy shop is to die for.

Those aprons would have come in handy while I was mixing up the guts to the cake …

Which we devoured.

Like I said, though, it was fantastic. I felt comfortable (once I got over myself) and I can’t wait for the next one. I think I’ll wear a wig though … then I can pretend I’m PW or something and maybe I’ll feel more comfortable being all “And then you add some salt, just a pinch.” Weird. Weird weird weird.

Let’s meet the attendee’s:

Donielle came along with one of her Peanuts. Isn’t she adorable? I got to hold her for about 45 seconds while Donielle strapped on her trusty carrier for her Peanut to rest in while she demonstrated Kefir to the group (and let us try it!) and my uterus started screaming at me.

You can see why, no?

Rebekah came after spending the morning antiqueing with Michelle (another attendee) in Saugatuck. SO FUN!

And here’s Michelle – Hi Michelle! Love your name

I was going to have all the recipes written out for each girl and wrapped all nice but then I had a sick husband, remembered that I have 2 kids and had a broken car in one week … so … you know. They had to transfer them over to a recipe card themselves, but I think they forgive me.

I didn’t capture a great photo of Candace, but you can see her here:

Candace and I go way back. I’ll just leave it at that. She’s a texture girl, just like me, as far as food goes. She wasn’t too hip on the Salmon but that’s ok – she tried it! They all did, which was the best part for me.

Sitting down with everyone after making all the food and just getting to know each other. That’s what this is all about for me. You. All of you.

While we were all standing in the kitchen Donielle demonstrated Kefir to us …

It was so interesting and I took some home to try out on my kids … they both LOVED it. It’s like fizzy juice, or pop … which is exactly what Jessica called it once she tried it. I was starting to look at doing this so now I’m glad I know what it’s supposed to look/taste like and I think I’ll go ahead and give it a try.

What a day! But it’s not over.

Red Bird Ink etsy shop wants to give you a chance to win a letterpress print from their shop in the name of cooking. Amen.

They’re offering up one of their Cow Parts No3 Prints to one of my lucky readers!!

To Enter:

Click through to their shop and leave a comment back on this post telling me your favorite print, stationary or coaster they have listed.

That’s it! Please give them some love, I have an addiction to letterpress and I LOVE their shop.

***Contest ends Tuesday evening 10 pm EST March 2, 2010, winner to be announced Wednesday March 3, 2010***

The Cooking Demo is happening today!! I’m pretty excited to see some blog friend faces and hang out. We might do some cooking while we’re at it.

Here’s the difference between me and Martha: Ms. Stewart would be hot-gluing butterflies and stars all over her handmade gift bags and then handwriting, caligraphy style, each attendee’s initials. Inside that gift bag would be more handmade goodness. Probably a small parcel filled with sweets, all handmade of course, and wrapped in cheese cloth. I’m fantasizing that she’d have her apron on, her make up done and an outfit pressed and ready to impress. She’d probably wear a fancy flat or heel.

Me?

I’ll be wearing slippers. I didn’t fire up the glue-gun but we do have gift bags and if I get around to handwriting the attendee’s names … it’ll be just that. Their name.

All with love though.

I’ve been picking my mom’s brain as I’m planning this Cooking Demo, trying to get her advice on when to start which dish … maybe I should talk about this, or that … just bouncing ideas off of her and I doubt it will come as a surprise that if my mom were planning this and throwing the Demo it would be a very different afternoon. Not in a bad way!! It’d be lovely. But it’d be to impress, to dazzle and sparkle … to inspire.

My mom is Betty Crocker and she taught Martha everything she knows. My mom is amazing.

I’m just messy.

I don’t mean to bring my mom into so many of my posts lately, but she’s FUNNY! She’s so starkly different from me and she’s my only reference point for how I got to be me. I mean, I am her clone … I will be her in 30 years physically but that’s about where the similarity stops.

A recipe for my mom is a guaranteed A, another four-point-oh mark on her transcript. A recipe for me is a suggestion. You can see how our demonstrations would be like night and day, no?

SO! Not to scare you, my lovelies, we’ll be having a recipe-following afternoon full of conversation, desserts, fun and laughter.

And we’ve got some pretty awesome sponsors to help it go that extra mile:

Kitchen Stories offered me a wonderful discount so I could send my attendee’s home with a little something-something. I just love her quote right off the bat – “I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond.” - Mae West I mean, how can you not want to hang out with this wonderful lady?

I didn’t have the budget to gift an apron to each of my guests … but you have to see these. The Pretty Ditty etsy shop is to die for.

I have a couple more surprises up my sleeve, but I want to wait to announce those to my attendee’s.

Can’t wait!

As a side note – this entire Cooking Demo is sponsored by me. No one is paying me to say I love their product or to use certain ingredients in the recipes I’ll be making today and posting about later.