To my pappy:

Mom is keeping us updated on your health and she’s recently told us that if there was something we wanted to say, we better say it. Tonight she called to let us know you’ve declined since the 24 hours we’ve last seen you.

At first I thought I had said everything I wanted to say, that I love you and I’m going to miss you more than you know. But then I started thinking and even though I may have told you before, I haven’t told you lately … and I wanted to be sure you knew.

Pappy, daddy, dad, Wayne and you old frog …

Thank you. Thank you so much for being who you are. You’ve taught me and shown me so many things. Unconditional love was second nature to you and I can’t thank you enough for the oppertunities you’ve brought to us and the memories you’ve made with us.

I love you dad – I’m so afraid of you not being here for me to talk to. I’m scared that I’ll forget you in 10 or 20 years, I’m scared that my baby will miss out on one of the most important people in my life.

Who’s going to dance with me on my birthday? It was our tradition, you and me , butterfly kisses in the background, tears in our eyes … just dancing.

Oh, pappy – my heart hurts so much, I used to think you were crazy when you used that expretion but I get it now, I get alot of things now. Like what you meant when you said, I’d understand one day, or that I’ll grow up fast enough so take it slow, enjoy the ride.

Do you remember mentos? Oh, I think I’ve eaten those right out of style. Every Sudnay we’d stop at Clark gas station and get a mentos for church. Jill and I liked the fruity ones and you and mom got the cinnamon. You even used to put them in my lunch so I wouldn’t forget you were thinking about me during the day. I was definitely center of the “trade ya my fruit rollup or swiis cake roll for your mentos?!?!” at lunch time.

There’s so much more to say but at the same time there’s nothing to say at all.

Would you dance with me one more time, pappy?

There’s two things I know for sure
She was sent here from Heaven
And she’s daddys little girl
As I drop to my knees by her bed at night
She talks to Jesus and I close my eyes
And I thank God for all of the joy in my life
Oh but most of all

For butterlfy kisses after bedtime prayer
Stickin little white flowers all up in her hair
Walk beside the pony dady
It’s my first ride
I know the cake looks funny daddy
But i sure tried
Oh with all that I’ve done wrong
I must have done something right
TO deseve a hug every mornin
And butterfly kisses at night

Sweet 16 today
She’s lookin like her mama
A little more every day
One part woman
The other part girl
To perfume and mke up
From ribbons and curls
Trying her wongs out in a great big world
But I remember

Butterlfy kisses after bedtime prayer
Stickin little white flowers all up in her hair
You know how much I love you dady
But if you don’t mind
I’m only gonna kiss you on the check this time
Oh with all that I’ve done wrong
I muct have done something right
To deserve her love every mornin
And butterfly kisses at night

All the precious time
Like the wind the years go by
Precious Butterfly
Spread yuor wings and fly

She’ll change her name today
She’ll make a promise and I’ll give her aways
Standing in the bride room just starin at her
She asked me what I’m thinkin
And I said I’m not sure
I just feel like I’m loosin my baby girl
And she leaned over

And gave me butterfly kisses with her mama there
Stickin little white flowers all up in her hair
Walk me down the isle daddy
It’s just about time
Does my wedding gown look pretty daddy?
Daddys don’t cry
Oh with all that I’ve done wrong
I must have done something right
To deserve her love every mornin and butterfly kisses
I couldn’t ask GOd for more than this is what love is
I know I’ve got to let her go but I’ll always remember
Every hug in the mornin and butterly kisses

1/2 way there

I’m officially a little over half way through this pregnancy. So far depsite fainting and minor complications I’ve had an awesome pregnancy and have loved being pregnant.

I am getting anxious to hold this little person though. I keep envisioning sitting on the couch with this little body all curled up in the nape of my neck, breathing and making noises. I get goose bumps waiting for it.

The baby is moving a considerable amount of the time, and depending on how patient you are, you can even feel it kick. Aaron has enjoyed being able to experience this pregnancy more and more through feeling the baby and going to the doctors appointments and grilling me on whats going on at certain stages.

It’s been fun and I’m sad thats it’s more than half over, but I’m really excited to experience the next few months and stages of pregnancy and even more excited that I’m that much closer to holding our baby.

A mighty task

Aaron and I halfway completed our registry today at Target and www.target.com. There are a few things I need to delete yet – but target.com isn’t that user friendly for the “already registered” right now.

We also registered at Babies R Us, found online at www.babiesrus.com (amazon supported). We got a book of information from target with suggestions of what to register for and how much of what to register for – there’s alot of stuff to register for according to these people.

There’s a few big things like the crib and changing station or dresser that we haven’t registered for partly because we can’t decide or don’t like the choices and partly because we need to match the wood to a rocking chair we already have. But we also want to check out antique markets and stores for some unconventional baby furniture, not the crib, don’t worry.

And of course there are those things that are needed but are dang expensive. Like the breast pump, car seats, etc… Good thing most of these purchases are only a one time purchase, to be reused with subsequent children.

There are a couple things I’m very excited about. The Moses basket we registered for at Target, and the cloth diapers we registered for at Babies R Us. You probably think I’m nuts to want to reuse and wash diapers, what with all the garbage I could be disposing of on a daily basis, why wouldn’t I use conventional diapering methods?

Well when they’re newborns, all they do is eat and poop or pee – so instead of throwing away his or her college fund on diapers in the first few months, why not make use of reusing environment friendly diapers? Thats what I thought. Plus, I’ve been reading reviews on amazon.com and talking to people and reading about parenting and whatnot and I think I’m making the decision to best fit our lifestyle.

The Moses basket is special to me because in Nigeria (I was born there, for those of you who don’t know) the leper’s made baskets of all kind, one being the Moses basket, which my parents purchased and it was my bed for the better part of the first year of my life 🙂

So anywho – the baby now kicks and jumps on my blatter at random but frequent times during the day and night – and, well, what can I say – it’s annoying and I have to go pee AGAIN, for the 27th time today.

After short, but much needed break … we’re back.

Um, I don’t know what else I really wanted to say about the registry, other than it’s exhausting and I totally deserve some Maccaroni and Cheese right now.

Oh – ok, I have some exciting news … I’m going part time at work in September. Which I’m very excited about. I’ll be able to help my mom with my dad and get setteled into our new house. I think it’ll be the best thing I could have done for myself during this pregnancy, with everything going on in my personal life. I’m very much looking forward to the time off.

And if this isn’t the most random ending post I’ve written lately … well, I don’t know. But the water’s boiling for my Mac-n-Cheese, and people, seriously, I don’t know how to use punctuation.

NAMES!

Like a lightning bolt outside of Crazy Horse last night a name hit us. I was going back and forth on a name that, at one point, Aaron had liked … and of course, doesn’t anymore. So we were thinking of names just trying to get our thinkers going and he said a name – and I sat there, in complete awe that I liked the name he had mentioned. Infact I love the name he mentioned and OHMYGOSH we have a name.

The rest of the meal was mostly me giggling because we FINALLY decided on a name, for a boy, AHA!

We have a few choices for a girl’s name, any of which we would love, but I think we’re solidifying that one soon too … down to one name that is. We’ll let you know when that lightning bolt hits us. Which I think it hit me today, but I have to get Aaron to agree completely.

And just so I don’t get emails secretly asking me what these names are … we’re not telling, so don’t ask.

Well, I shouldn’t say we AREN’T telling ANYONE. I’m sure Aaron will have live feed from the hospital and the moment we know, you’ll know … so in January sometime we’ll be telling.

Because tired never meant feet aching, back braking, eyes watering, mouth yawning torture before all this.

Yea, I’m tired. Exhausted. We’re moving. And I’m pregnant, almost 5 months pregnant. My size 4 feet are swollen and my toes hurt from the pressure of my growing body. My back hurts just because it hates me and my eyes WON’T STOP WATERING nor will my mouth NOT STOP YAWNING!

The sad thing is, this is the first night we started packing. Granted it’s at the end of my night – when I’m tired anyway, but it doesn’t help. Bending over 3,000 times in less than an hour to put mugs, glasses, vases and other breakables in a box on the floor … yea – not so fun at 10 pm.

I’ll be this tired and worse for atleast the next 2 months, if not more. We have to paint 4 rooms, re-carpet 3, put new vinyl in the kitchen, update the electrical and put a new roof on the new house.

We’re crazies. I know. And we knew all this when we looked at the house and decided to buy it. We’re in love with it though and have most everything covered as far as who’s putting the carpet in and what not. So hopefully we won’t have to break our backs in a matter of weeks to finally live in the house we purchased. But it is going to take some time.